Taking Pictures of Mountains

 For  Bethany, Katelyn, Katie, Lisa Marie, and Sara


Wow. My poor blog has been getting rather dusty, as I have neglected it painfully. However, at least I can say without reservation that my absence has been from living, and there is no better excuse. This scenario reminds me of the day my friends Joe, Jeanette, and I were riding through the mountains of Scotland in our rented Peugeot in October of 2011. We snapped pictures of the mountains out the windows, but, there came a place on our journey when things were so breathtaking that we had to lay our cameras down. No pictures exist of this stretch of our trip, because they would not do it justice.
Sometimes, though, the camera has to come out again...something has to be captured in its rawest and purest form, and "click" goes the shutter...boom...light...flash...captured forever.

It's Saturday, a day of busyness, and business. For me, this week, a day I will remember forever. On this day, I brushed my dark hair, tied it back into a quick bun, and donned a school hoodie, and my favorite pair of jeans, ones I bought in college about six years ago. Nothing special. So you'd think. But, this post is to remind myself (and those of my loved ones who read it) that the camera often comes out most ferociously on the days of school hoodies and old jeans...to capture that which seems typical...that which we might otherwise overlook.
I cleaned all of the icky stuff out of my fridge (proof that I haven't been here nearly as much as I'd like), and resolved that I'd leave here today for only one reason: to take out the trash. I got a message between the washing and drying of my hair from one of my best friends, venting frustration, needing comfort "click" went my shutter. "Just a second" I told her. I slipped the hoodie over my head and breathed in the sweet smell of the detergent it had just been washed in. Clean clothes...something most people don't have...click.
I ran to my computer to talk to her, and here I am, typing this, and talking to her...she will see this post soon, and realize what a definitive day this is, for both of us.
We've been friends for a long time, and she's been on an emotional roller coaster for far longer than I would wish for her, but on the day it began, I strapped myself in beside her. As I opened my computer to help her contend with her emotions, I remembered all of those captured moments we've had together, strapped into the roller coaster I chose, and still choose, to ride with her.

Now, on this day, I take a picture of a different sort. Yesterday, I made a decision. A decision that is not public, and will not be made public here, either. It, again, reminded me of the Scottish mountain pictures. See, often times, we as people FIGHT to get the clearest picture of what is before us, and in the moment, trying to capture it, trying to fight for focus, we miss the majesty that is wrapping its arms around us right this second, and then, nobody gets the picture for keeps, AND we miss it in real time too. Tragic, yes?
To avoid the tragedy of missing the majestic, I chose to do something, something I believe is beautiful, and something I cherish. If I'm honest with myself, it's the decision I wanted, and perhaps that's why I fought it so hard, because I really had a hard time believe that the decision I wanted could be an obedient or optional decision ... "click"...there went my shutter again...at that moment I realized that I could take a picture in my mind of how wonderful I felt at the thought of deciding a certain way, and take that for what it was worth...

I made the decision, the one that involved dropping things, laying them down, and not shouldering them. Or, perhaps the one that involved shouldering my own dreams, and not someone else's status quo version of my dreams. Click...boom...flash...captured image. I made the decision, a decision my friend, the one I'm seated beside, will probably be proud of, and a decision that frees me to do something I yearn for...something passionate and fierce, something service oriented, something bright. Instead of sitting with my camera out the window, trying to get the clearest picture of what is passing before me, I chose to lay the camera down...I chose to move in the moment, to leave marks with finger and footprints rather than film.
When it comes out that i've made my decision, many may say such things as "what about the evidence? Where is the proof ? What of the PICTURES?" I will look at those people and tell them, I will tell them, in life we have two options...we can take pictures of the mountains, or we can move them. I chose the latter, and this post represents the the only "picture" I need.

"Though the mountains be shaken, and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken, nor my covenant of peace be removed, this is what the Lord says, the Lord who has compassion on you." Isaiah 54:10